My Third Trimester

I am now into week 35 of my pregnancy and I realised the other day that I hadn’t posted an update for almost 10 weeks… I couldn’t believe how fast that time had gone and also that I am almost at the very end of this pregnancy. A lot has happened in the third trimester… from decorating our nursery, our angel babies 1st birthday, my baby shower and also the general aches and pains that the third trimester brings, so I wanted to update you all.

How I have been feeling:

So its safe to say this trimester has been a crazy rollercoaster of emotions for me, once I got over the 26 week mark (where we had a previous still born) I felt like everything was going really well and I felt so well in myself compared to my previous pregnancy – I felt like this pregnancy was going as planned and the worrying from earlier on in the pregnancy had started to settle. Then as we got closer to our angel babies first birthday I was feeling very emotional, guilty and sad that I was having another baby and didn’t want Sebastian to think we had forgotten him… On his birthday it was actually the memorial service for all of the Angel Babies at the church where he was cremated so this made it especially sad for us and seeing a church full of parents (literally hundreds) who had also lost their babies really hit me hard and I know my pregnancy hormones wouldn’t have helped but it was a really hard week that week. The following week after Sebastian birthday was my baby shower… so I felt like I had to quickly snap into a different mind frame to be happy and positive and excited about this new baby… but every since Sebastians birthday I have just been filled with doubt that something is still going to happen to this baby again. Luckily the fact that I get to go to St Mary’s Rainbow Clinic every 2 weeks for a scan has helped me to be assured that this baby is doing really well and is now a whopping 6lbs already, but still I have so many concerns and worries going through my head every day.

I am also struggling with severe SPD which is agony on my pubic bone… so walking and climbing stairs is now very painful for me (I think it is so bad because I have been scared to exercise during this pregnancy, as last time I was still very active).. so I am literally counting down the days until baby arrives now so that I can start to feel a bit more normal again… I have also been blessed with major water retention haha! So my face, hands, legs and feet now feel double the size (the joys that pregnancy brings!) I think I feel more down about all of these things is because I still have doubt in my mind that something is going to wrong in this pregnancy… People keep saying to me it will all be worth it in the end (I won’t believe them until baby is actually here in my arms).

Now for something a little more positive..

Birth Plan:

I have been advised by my consultant at St Mary’s that I should have a c section – This is because Sebastian had a very bad brain haemorrhage whilst inside of me, I have since been tested for everything and nothing has come back but there is still a slight chance that it could happen again… So to avoid babies head having any unnecessary pressure they have said that a C section will be the best option. At first I was a little worried about this but all I want is for this baby to get here as safely as possible and also I have already gone through natural labour with Sebastian so I won’t feel like I’m missing out or upset that I haven’t been able to experience natural labour…This time its all about this baby!

Nursery:

Our Nursery is pretty much complete now apart from a few finishing touch.. we have gone for a really neutral design with hints of blue… All the walls are grey and then our furniture is white with lots of cosy blankets and furry rugs. Then we have pale blue photo frames, details and teddies in there to make it more personal. We almost have everything ready now and I have washed all of babies clothes and they are all hung up to dry so that I can get the hospital bag ready so that I feel prepared just incase we need to go in a little earlier than expected.

Baby Shower:

I had the most beautiful baby shower at Piccolino in Alderley Edge and I invited everyone I wanted to see before baby came. It was so nice to have everyone there because I have felt like I have been hibernating a little bit during this pregnancy and then I know I’ve seen everyone now and can plan lots of lovely things for when baby is here and I am able to get out and about again after my c sections (because you can’t drive for 6 weeks after) so I’m looking forward to seeing friends after Christmas.

Postnatal Exercise:

Im soooo looking forward to exercising again post pregnancy… I can’t wait to get out walking with the pram and I also have a baby carrier so that I can get out and be hands-free. I think for the first 6 weeks I will be trying to do as much walking as possible and then after the 6 weeks I will be getting my boyfriend to put together a training programme for me to help me regain my core and get stronger again… before finally going out running (which I can’t wait to do) once I am fully recovered… Because I need to loose a lot of weight!!!

We are also planning on doing some outdoor fitness classes for mum and babies as I know a lot of you are around the similar stage of pregnancy as me so it would be great to meet lots of you and get rid of our baby weight together!

I hope you’ve enjoyed my update and if any of you have any advice you would like to give or any baby essentials you couldn’t live without then I would love to know… Also if you want to ask me any questions, ask away!!!

 

 

Gender Reveal

I want to share with you all as much of my pregnancy as possible.. so basically we have been dying to find out if we are having a boy or a girl for such a long time. In my previous pregnancy I had a stillbirth and we lost our baby Sebastian so for me finding out in this pregnancy was so important because I felt that if I was going to be having a girl this time I would really have to get my head around it, whereas if we were going to have a boy I felt that it would help my grieving process slightly and we have everything in our house for a baby boy already… Not that we would ever prefer one instead of the other as all I want is a healthy baby after what happened to Sebastian. But basically we are over the moon that we have finally found out the sex and that our rainbow baby is a little boy!! ❤

We have had so many scans so far and the midwives at the hospital scanning me haven’t wanted to tell me the gender as they said most mums have to wait until 20 weeks, which is fair enough but yesterday we had our scan with Fetal Medicine (FMU) at St Mary’s in Manchester (where they do a really detailed scan of the brain, heart, limbs, fluid and placenta) and they gave us a 45 minute scan and I have to say I officially fell in love with our baby at this scan. We got to watch him on the screen for all that time, we got to see his face, lips, nose and eyes really close up and we got to see his hands and little feet. It was absolutely magical, watching him snuggle his face into my placenta, already trying to cuddle me was the best thing in the world. It’s safe to say we both got a little teary and had beaming smiles all day after the scan!

So I am now 21 weeks and definitely think that finding out the gender really makes the pregnancy feel real and like there is a real life little person growing inside of you. I just can’t wait to meet him now and hope everything goes smoothly ❤

Depression

Ok, so.. after Sebastian was born, we were allowed to spend the day with him… baring in mind I was so drugged up and I had to be taken into theatre to have an epidural to get the placenta out. Once I got back from theatre at 7pm that evening Sebastian was taken away.. It still hadn’t hit me what had actually happened over the past 24 hours. For Ainslee he had to watch it all and probably absorbed what was going on a little better than me. After another night in the hospital we were able to go home… I was still feeling a little dizzy and light headed from the painkillers and Ainslee had to shower and dress me that morning because my legs still felt a bit numb from the epidural.

So we went home and as I opened the door my mum gave me a parcel… It was all of the paper work to finalise our mortgage and confirmation that we were about to exchange contracts for our new house. We had been so stressed about all of this throughout my pregnancy that we felt like our little angel had somehow done something to let us finally have the house of our dreams and be together.

With this in mind I wanted to go furniture shopping…. so Ainslee took me and we bought so much stuff and ordered our sofa, bed, tables, chairs… candles.. you name it we had ordered it all. Everything was ready to arrive on our moving in date, which had been confirmed.

I was focusing all my attention on our new house and making sure it was perfect because I wasn’t having anyone ruin this for us. Once we moved in it felt like our little safe heaven because our house is in the country side away from everyone, we were so happy that we could eventually be together and not really have to make much effort with anyone else. It’s safe to say looking back now that this was when the depression started to kick in.

We had Sebastians funeral coming up and I wanted to see him one last time because I felt like whilst I was drugged up in hospital I didn’t really get to give him a final cuddle. So we went along to the mortuary and we went in a room to see him. He looked nothing like what I remembered… He looked like all of the goodness I gave him had gone and it was heart breaking. I felt like he wasn’t been looked after… it was devastating. It soon came round to the funeral and we decided me and Ainslee would just be attending. We wanted it to just be us so that we could cry and so that we could have it as low key as possible.

After the funeral weeks went by where I would be working all day and late into the night.. I was putting every little bit of my energy and thoughts into work. It wasn’t until Christmas and probably the whole of January were I was a complete mess. Why were people saying Happy Christmas to me? Why should I be celebrating? OUR BABY HAS JUST DIED!! It was so frustrating and I just wanted it to be January so badly so that we could start a fresh New Year. Obviously this is much easier said than done.. MY DUE DATE was the 24th January and all of the girls that I was pregnant with now had there babies….. It was hard and we were having to go for tests at the hospital because Sebastian had a brain haemorrhage whilst inside of me and they were trying to find out why, these tests seemed to take forever which really made everything drag out a lot more than I felt it should.

All of our tests came back negative and we still don’t know to this day why it happened. This whole time I haven’t had any calls from the doctors or the hospital checking up on me to see how my mental state is. I would like to think I am quite a positive person and even for me I have had some pretty dark times. So I don’t know how other people get on (say if they have previously been diagnosed with depression etc)

If I had given birth to a heathy baby I would of been checked for postnatal depression, which they take really seriously… so why not check up on someone who will 100% have post natal depression after having a still born. It shocks me…. even to the point of going to the dentist… When you’re pregnant you get 9 months free dental care whilst pregnant and 6 months free after your pregnancy. So when I went to the dentist last week the receptionist says after my 5 minute check up… “That’ll be £40 please” So I say “Im exempt from paying because I was pregnant” So she asks me if I’m currently pregnant or have a baby… So I say “I had a still birth” this obviously makes me cry… so Im stood crying in the middle of a waiting room.. and she says “Sorry the NHS don’t give exemption if your pregnant was terminated, don’t worry you’ll start to feel better soon. £40 please.” I was absolutely shocked by her response and if I was in my normal state I wouldn’t of payed and kicked up a BIG fuss… but because I was so shocked by her reaction I just payed and got out of there as quickly as possible.

Baring in mind I had been going to that dentist since I was 2 years old.. and it being a private clinic where I know they could of had a little sympathy and understanding… but no!!! Its like people just don’t understand it as being so horrific and life destroying. It is by far in my experience the worst thing to happen to a couple.

So looking on to the future I don’t think I will seriously feel happy in myself until I get pregnant again… I think when you loose a baby, whether that baby was planned or not. You prepare yourself for that little person to come into your life… so when that doesn’t happen you feel empty and like there is a little hole in your life that you need filling. Hopefully it won’t be too long until we get that hole filled…

Going to the salon whilst pregnant..

You will probably no by now that I love having my hair done by one of my clients at Umberto Giannini in Harvey Nichols, Manchester. From just popping in for a braid to getting the whole works done…. So when I became pregnant I thought it was going to be tricky having my colour done like I used to as you hear so many stories about chemicals harming the baby and having awful skin reactions. So I thought what better way than to chat with the professional him self Ben (Manager of Umberto Giannini) and find out all the top tips about looking after your hair during and after your pregnancy.

Can I get my hair coloured whilst pregnant? 

Once you are out of the first trimester (12 weeks) you can get your hair coloured as normal. You MUST tell your hairdresser though as they need to take into consideration that because of your hormones the colour may not take as well as it normally would, meaning that the colour may need a little longer.

Could I go for a dramatic colour change whilst pregnant?

We advise all of our clients to stick with a similar colour to what they already have. As going a different shade could prove difficult in reaching your desired colour when your hair doesn’t take as well as it would normally.

Could having my hair coloured cause harm to the baby?

No, as long as you are out of the first trimester there can be no harm done to your growing baby. With new technologies in hair colorants it is always safe to use.

Why is my hair growing so much now I’m pregnant?

Because your hormones are racing around your body and also if you are taking a pregnancy vitamin along with a healthy pregnancy diet this can all contribute to faster growing hair.

Why does my hair get tangled so easily now I’m pregnant?

Knotted hair is a common symptom for mums-to-be as your body is concentrating on making sure your baby is developing nicely… So things like dry skin and tangled hair are only temporary until the baby arrives.

Once the baby does arrive do I need to do anything differently with my hair? (I have heard about peoples hair falling out)

I recommend to all my clients that they should take a basic hair and nail vitamin once their baby arrives, but make sure you go to your GP and make sure that this is the best thing for YOU and that the vitamin is safe to use if you are breast feeding.

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Ben and Ellie on shoot.

So having a relaxing time at the salon doesn’t need to be a thing of the past now that you’re pregnant.

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If you would like to make an appointment at Umberto Giannini for all appointments and consultations you can either download the Umberto Giannini app or call the salon on 0161 828 8840. Cut and finish start from only £37.

Luxury Pregnancy Massage by YourBeautyPod

I was sooo looking forward to having a pregnancy massage with Your Beauty Pod, as I’m sure you’ll know if you have been pregnant before or if you are currently pregnant your body goes through so many changes.

As I am just coming up to 19 weeks I haven’t reached the point where I get back ache or struggle with water retention yet…. but as the first trimester wasn’t too kind on me with bad morning sickness, being constantly tired and having the worst breakout of spots from the sudden surge of hormones, I was so ready for Rebecca at Your Beauty Pod to work her magic on me.

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I LOVE visiting the city centre beauty room – As I often have meetings or have to visit clients in Manchester so when I know I can finish my day off with a visit to see Rebecca – It makes any day 100x better, she also does home visits so if you can’t get into Manchester or if you would just prefer to have your treatments done in your own home she can come to you.

When I arrived at Your Beauty Pod, Rebecca explained to me that because I am not very big yet, she was going to focus on my legs – exfoliating and massaging them.. which will prevent water retention as it boosts circulation and blood flow, then I can either have a head and neck massage or a facial… I decided to go for the facial as she always does an amazing job at clearing my skin up when I have a break out so I knew it would be amazing.

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All of the products that are used at Your Beauty Pod are all organic, natural products, perfect for mums-to-be and they all smell absolutely beautiful. From getting onto the heated beauty bed, having my legs and feet massaged to finishing the facial with a relaxing neck and shoulder massage… the whole treatment experience was bliss! I will be returning to Your Beauty Pod in a few months time when I am much bigger and can’t wait to tell you all about my experience.

Visit Your Beauty Pod on social media @YourBeautyPod on Instagram and Facebook, @BeccaBeautyPod on Twitter.

If you aren’t pregnant but want to visit Your Beauty Pod here are some more treatments you could have done.

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